Bollywood is the epitome of colours and entertainment. Hundreds of movies are released every year in India and Bollywood produces the highest number of movies in a year if compared internationally. Bollywood is in the heart of every Indian. When in India, Bollywood is EVERYWHERE!

Bollywood is in the songs we listen to, very item number we dance to, those signature steps of our favourite stars, those catchy dialogues. Bollywood makes us dream. I’m sure every one of us must have had that one thought in our mind when we would have been young, “Mai HERO banunga!” Bollywood is in the minds of the people who go to the theatre leaving the reality outside just to enjoy those 150 minutes. Bollywood is in the dream. Bollywood is craziness. Bollywood is love.

Ekta Kapoor is the most “loved” producer/director of our industry. From TV to Bollywood, she has made her mark everywhere. She is known for the awareness she spreads about the importance of Potassium in our bodies by naming all her movies and shows from “K”. One of her show actor also holds the record for the longest living person on earth. She has the power to raise the dead (No, she is not the night king! Relax!).

Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara is one of my favourite and also one of the best Bollywood movies. But I just got wondering, what if this movie was made by Ekta Kapoor in her style! Here are 10 things that are sure to happen:

  • Name Change

The movie would not be called Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara. Instead it will be called Kyunki Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara. Well, we need those K’s, don’t we! YASSS Queen!

  • The Multiple Camera Shots

There would be multiple zoom in’s and zoom out’s for ATLEAST FIVE MINUTES whenever something important is happening. Each and every surrounding person’s face would be shown during this time. This would include the leads, the family members, the waiter, the bartender, the watchman, the lizard on the wall, the crow on the window, everyone!!!!

  • Twists

The scene where Laila chases Arjun on the bike would turn out in a much different way. Imagine this, Laila rides the bike but on the way meets with an accident, the local people take her to the nearby “CITY Hospital”. Unconscious, she keeps murmuring Arjun’s name. Arjun on the other side gets a feeling something is wrong. He asks Kabir and Imran to turn the car and go back to the Laila. On the way, they see the accident prone area. Arjun gets down to find Laila’s some jewellery there. They hurry to a nearby hospital and find Laila there. Laila confesses her love to Arjun before being shifted to the operation theatre. But when she comes out, she has lost her memory.

  • Love Triangles

Everyone would be in love with someone who is already in a relationship forming love triangles. They would do anything to sabotage the other person’s relationship. Hero loves heroine, marries her, divorces her, then marries her sister, divorces her too and at last marries the heroine again.

  • Aging is for loser

Nobody would grow old. Whether it Kabir and Natasha’s family or Imran’s dad, everyone will look 25 even though they are 60.

  • Heavy Jewellery is a must

Whether it is Katrina or Kalki, whether they are on the beach or dancing in the pub, heavy jewellery is a must.

  • Drama and Tears

The time when Kabir decides to end things with Natasha, she would suddenly end up saying the dialogue, “Mai Tumhare Bacche Ki Maa Banane Wali Hu!” And a huge drama will follow with all the crying and sobbing and “Ye Mera Baccha Nahi Hai!” Natasha will go ahead to raise the kid alone who will grow up (to be Salman Khan) and come back to take revenge from Kabir (to be featured in the sequel of the movie). On the other hand, Arjun’s wife from the previous birth (played by Kareena Kapoor) will come back to take him away from Laila.

Featuring the “dhantanananadhantanana” music. Oh! Tears are a must.

  • Senorita Su Che!

Hrithik, Abhay and Farhan will be seen doing the garba on the beats of senorita.

  • Long Long Episode

The events i.e. the deep sea diving, sky diving and Bull Run, will go on and on and on and on. If not, there will surely be some big drama taking place.  Also, background tracks will be louder than the actual dialogues.

  • Sequel

There will surely be a sequel with a 30 years leap. Everyone will look the same except they will have some white strands of hair and wear specs. Someone may have done a plastic surgery. Someone will be divorced and someone will be back from the dead. And then, there would be a shocking reunion!

The reunion may also feature some other characters like Kabir’s wife Pooja (Priyanka Chopra) and daughter Alia Bhatt, Laila and Arjun will be divorced and Laila will be living with her uncle, the big business tycoon, Mr. Saini (played by Rajinikanth). She would be in a relationship with another person too (Shahrukh Khan). Imran will be divorced to his first wife (Deepika) and married the second time ( Sunny Leone). Natasha is also married to another person (Aamir Khan).

But, no matter what, in the end, there is a happy ending!

This is just a quirky take on Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara for fun. This post is no way meant to bring offense to anyone.

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